James Brown Gift Advice

Last night something magical happened. Let me paint you a picture:

James Brown visited me in my dream…

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this is what my dream looked like

And I was like, “whoa, Mr. Brown, what are you doing here?!”

And he was like, “I’m everywhere.”

And then I was like, “Oh…sorry, can you give me some advice?”

And he said sure.

“Well, James, I have been wondering what to get my man-friend for Valentine’s Day…I just don’t have any idea.”

And then James Brown was like:

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gettin real

Me: But how?


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So after James Brown did a super cool split jump, I had to hustle… you know?! So I started to wake up and James faded into the light, as I left my dream.

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this was sad for me

I was confused, so I did the only thing I knew how to do:

Google James Brown

And there! on the second page of results — James Brown appeared in the form of a really good gift idea for my man:

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this is kind of creepy yet fabulous

The above image is a digital rendering of JAMES BROWN CUFFLINKS !!!

Eleven Forty Co. makes really cool cufflinks inspired by iconic figures throughout the ages.

They even have an Obama inspired design

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but, between you and me, I will probably buy cufflinks from Spitfire (in stores only).

Anyway, the point of the story is this-

Tonight when I go back to sleep, I am going to channel James Brown again, and I’m gonna say,

“Hey, James, thanks for the classy gift idea.”

And he’ll reply:

“I’m a sex machine.”